eMo

Feel like blogging something , but I have no idea what to write about. Was surfing forums and reading blogs moments ago, then I came across a blog and read something from there. Right after it, lots of things crossing my mind and been thinking a lot now. Eversince I made my blog private, I've sent an invitation to her, and I kept on checking the permission site of this blog, and see whether has she accepted my invitation or not. As days passed by til today, she still hasnt accept it yet, I guess I dont mean anything to her anymore.

Sometimes I just wonder, did I done anything so wrong in the past til I have such treatment from you now. I enjoyed the time we spent together. I enjoyed the time where I went to the place where you at without letting you know. I enjoyed buying things that you like and giving it to you. I enjoyed the time where we had fun together. I enjoyed the time where we would sms each other and share things together. But good times like these didnt last long, hell I wish it did. It was going well all along, and I dont know where it went wrong. You always keeping things to yourself, and you said you're having trouble expressing it out. But to me, I think you just dont want to let it out.

You told everyone that I'm a great friend to you, but then in reality, it doesnt seems like what you stated. Why do you wish to tell the whole world that we're like that when its not? You might think that I'm too selfish over the things that I did to you, but deep down inside you, you knew that I aint like what they think I am. I did nothing wrong as a friend, and now Im getting such treatment from you in return, after all that I done. You once asked me, does everyone deserve a second chance? I said yes, but it seems like you aint giving me any. Friends dont work that way, they will honestly tell each other what they're thinking in their minds, not the other way round.

I just want to know who am I to you, and start to treat me as what you think I am to you. It doesnt really matter anymore, as I know you wont be reading this anyway. Sometimes I just dont understand why do you want to ignore or avoid someone til it hurts so much. If by doing things like this will able to make you happy and smile, even at the expense of hurting me like this, then by all means, you should continue doing this.